I Will Not Withdraw My Faithful Love from Him

 


In my moments of deepest discouragement, I find myself fighting thoughts of being abandoned. I know that God is always with me, and I can't even count the number of times that the Bible reminds me of that. However, the devil has a way of convincing me that this time will be the time that God doesn't remember me. When things aren't going the way I think they should and God doesn't seem to be answering me, and just when I feel like maybe I should give up, I take my morning walk and read this verse. Again I am reminded that God is always faithful, and He will not withdraw his love from me.

Today, this verse is a reminder to me with two meanings: (1) God has promised to never leave me nor forsake me, and (2) I make a similar promise to my family. Over the time that we spent with Abe in the past year, one thing I wanted to make sure he understood is that we are committed to loving and caring for him for the rest of our lives. Just because we have not had any communication with him in several months does not change how we feel--he will forever be a part of our family.

There have been days when my grief and frustration have been almost unbearable, and I allow myself to become convinced that we will never see or hear from Abe again. There have been days when I have questioned the entire past year and a half, wondering if what we tried to do even made any difference. There have been days when I have hated myself because I felt like I actually made Abe's life worse. On my very worst days, I feel like I have not only made Abe's life worse but I have also made Angie and Rayne and Carrie's lives worse in the process.

Then I remember that night in February 2023 when I felt God telling me to step into Abe's life and make him a part of our family. I know beyond the shadow of any doubt that God brought our family together with Abe for a purpose, and I know that God does not make mistakes. (Most importantly, I know that God is able to work around my mistakes!) I don't know God's overall purpose for me or my family, but I do know that He is still working all things out and that Abe is still a part of the plan.

I read something recently that said that love is something you feel but unconditional love is something you do. In other words, unconditional love is a commitment to continue loving, no matter the circumstances. In writing this post, I realize there is a third meaning for me in today's verse: (3) I commit that same promise to always love and never leave my faithful Father. God has his part taken care of--I just have to keep remembering my part and trust God to take care of the rest.

Heavenly Father, forgive me for the moments when I forget Your faithfulness. You have promised to never leave me or forsake me, and I promise to do everything in my power to do the same, both for You and for the family you have given me to love. Thank you, Father, for teaching me what unconditional love means. In the faithful name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

That Light Shines in the Darkness

Image
  My favorite poem includes the phrase "The woods are lovely, dark, and deep." This year, I have experienced much of the darkness of God's woods, along with its loveliness and depth, but one thing has remained true: Jesus is my light shining in the darkness. I may not be able to see what might be around the next turn, but the darkness will not overcome my guiding light. For the past few weeks, I have not written as much as when I started recording this journey, and part of the reason is that I have wandered a little too much in the darkness. Once again, things have not gone the way I would have planned, and I have allowed the twisting path through the woods to cause me to become scared and anxious, instead of looking where the light shines. Today, I feel like the woods are a little less dense, and it is easier to see where I am supposed to be heading. I am not out of the darkness of the woods yet, but it feels like the trees are spread a little further apart. All I have t...
Read more

He Will Turn the Hearts of Fathers to Their Children

Image
Yesterday was the first day of classes at both Appalachian State University and NC State University, and I spent a large portion of my day thinking about and praying for both Rayne and Abe, our two sons. Both of these young men have overcome some major obstacles to make it to college, and I am beyond proud of the work, both academic and personal, that each of them has done to make it this far. I feel truly blessed to know that both boys are starting on the path to adulthood, and even if they don't need me by their side at all times, I pray that they know that I am right behind them, cheering them on. Truthfully, yesterday was a very hard day for me because it reminded me of the contrast between the two boys' situations. I sent a text to both boys to remind them that we love them, we are proud of them, and we are praying for them. According to my phone, Rayne read his text a little before he went to his first college class. Unfortunately, it appears that Abe has blocked my text ...
Read more

Be Still

Image
  Our pastor referenced this verse in the last sermon of his "Trust the Process" series. Truthfully, it was not the main verse of the message, but for me, it was one more reminder that God sees me. He knows my deepest pains, He knows my deepest desires, He knows my deepest fears, He knows my deepest anxieties, and He knows my deepest needs. When I really focus on this verse, I am reminded that those pains, desires, fears, anxieties, and needs are really not mine to worry about. God tells me to be still because I know that He is God. For a long time, I have said that this is my favorite verse. Now, it not only reminds me that I need to approach life's challenges calmly, but it also reminds me that I am not God. I am NOT the one to be exalted. For most of my life, I have been a very easy-going person who doesn't let much worry me. I used to think of this verse as my kind of "motto" in life, explaining why I didn't worry about things--I was just being still...
Read more